
We often learn how to communicate with others in our families. How does it feel to grow up in a chaotic family, though?
Every family has a certain dynamic between its members. While some families offer their children love, affection, and a secure atmosphere, others harm the developing child's personality.
A youngster should feel safe, protected, and free in a healthy family. Their needs are satisfied, their limits are respected, and their individuality is valued.
However, in dysfunctional families, there are dynamics where parents consistently and repeatedly fail to take care of their kids, emotionally abuse them, and treat them with disrespect.
Although it can contribute, growing up in a toxic home is not usually the cause of psychological trauma. A parent's death in a car accident can be traumatic for the child and lead to psychological problems. On the other side, growing up in a toxic household can do severe harm and have a long-lasting effect on a person.
What is a Toxic Family?
Every family experiences arguments or instances where members unintentionally damage each other. Some families have a history of disagreement or friction at every get-together, leaving family members exhausted and irritated.
You may have grown up in a poisonous atmosphere if you turn into your worst self around your relatives. Although a parent's love ought to be unwavering, you could have heard threats that if you don't comply with their demands or behave in a particular manner, you won't be allowed to stay in the family.
Siblings can be very different from you, and that should be cherished. The constant comparison might make you feel attacked and insecure if your family is toxic.
7 Symptoms of a Toxic Family
Abuse's wounds resonate for decades and can permanently alter a person's life. Were you a victim of abuse or neglect as a child? If so, here are some long-term consequences you may have encountered.
Overreacting Parents
It may be understandable for a parent to feel upset when a family heirloom is damaged. But if a parent consistently loses their temper over trivial, seemingly minor issues, this results in feelings of dread and anxiety.
A parent's illogical and inconsistent behavior over various issues makes it impossible for a child to predict when they will be yelled at or what behavior is wrong.
Feeling Anxious
Anxiety problems are frequently identified in children who grow up in a hazardous environment. A lack of security, an insecure environment, or physical and mental abuse brings this on.
Feeling anxious, tense, irritated, or restless are a few indicators that your family is toxic. Due to a lack of confidence in other people or their self-worth, it is challenging to have long-lasting relationships.
Criticizing Yourself
A dysfunctional parent or sibling's frequent belittling makes a child feel unworthy or undeserving. Adults who grow up in toxic homes begin to criticize themselves, second-guess their choices, and hesitate when making decisions.
This is tough to modify since they genuinely believe they are worse than others and lack mental and emotional assistance to teach them otherwise.
Drained Energy
Toxic parents and siblings can leave a youngster feeling defeated due to their neediness and high-maintenance nature. This can deplete a child's or adult's energy reserves.
Violent Mindset
Have you ever heard the expression "the mistreated becomes the abuser?" Unfortunately, this is a rather typical event. It's because they never acquired good dispute-resolution techniques.
Depression
Growing up in unpredictable or uncertain circumstances influences how children deal with stress. They're continuously on alert because they never know what will happen next.
Even when they are grown and have a place of their own, their brain has been programmed to be constantly alert. Because their bodies are used to higher stress-related hormones like cortisol, their fight or flight mode does not activate as quickly as others.
Drug and Alcohol & Self-Medication
Many people don't know how to deal with everything that has happened to them in the past, so they try to relieve their grief and try to escape from reality by self-medicating.
The disadvantage of this mental process is that the numbness fades as the intoxication fades, yet they must still face reality.
How to Overcome a Toxic Family?
A child's worst experience is growing up in a broken home. Setting boundaries is one of the most effective techniques to improve your behaviour around your toxic family.
As an adult, you are not required to spend all your time with your family. You can choose what works best for you and establish boundaries on how long you visit, where you meet, and what you discuss with them.
Some people withdraw totally, but others learn not to respond or accept responsibility for someone else's feelings, goals, or needs. To demonstrate their disengagement, they discuss neutral topics and avoid responding to negative comments.
When a toxic parent or sibling cannot elicit a reaction from you, they will usually stop harassing you. However, you can always leave to avoid the scenario if they do not.
Extreme anxiety, low self-esteem, worthlessness, difficulty trusting others, sustaining strong connections, or feeling exhausted after visiting your family are all indicators that you grew up in a toxic home.
Some strategies to help yourself include talking with supportive friends, keeping great connections, and taking care of your body by eating, resting, and staying hydrated.
When to Seek Help in These Types Of Situations?
If the negative feelings become overwhelming and the psychological trauma worsens, it is time to seek professional assistance. Some people have been trained to work with this type of trauma and can help alleviate the symptoms of a toxic family.
If you are feeling suicidal, remember those suicidal feelings can be conquered. Even if your situation appears hopeless now, there are people who love you and want you to stay.
Suicidal feelings can be overcome with the correct help. Seek treatment immediately if you are having suicidal thoughts, acting terrifyingly, or planning to commit suicide. Reach out to a trusted adult, such as a parent, doctor, or counselor, and be open and honest with them about your feelings.
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